Sibling Rivalry

As parents we managed to avoid most sibling rivalry between our four offspring by raising them to root for each other, to take ownership in one another's successes so that instead of being jealous they were excited for each other. When one of them succeeds at some accomplishment, the rest feel proud.

Today Howard Snyder's daily Facebook prayer contained this line: "Fill me with your love and regard for others, and deliver me from all jealousy when others succeed or surpass me in areas where I would like to excel or be known."

My first thought was how comforting it was to know I'm not the only one who struggles this way, a form of misery loves company.

My second thought was that if I could take the same kind of ownership for others as my children  have for each other, I wouldn't feel jealous. 

Romans 12:15 says, "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn." I've often said it can be easier to mourn with people than to rejoice with them. Rejoicing requires acceptance of their victory.

If I could truly own the sibling nature of humanity, then instead of sibling rivalry, feel a sense of partnership with others, I could rejoice when others succeed, instead of wishing that were me. And when I did succeed, I've have siblings rooting for me as well.

That is the essence of Howard's prayer, asking God to fill him with such love and regard for others that jealousy has no place. 

Lord, reshape us in this form. Give us courage to allow you to do so. Show us how to truly celebrate the victories of others, trusting you to give us the victories we need when we need them. Amen.